Saturday, June 6, 2009

Names

-Beach answers, spring thoughts

-Jesus was the king of men, Jèsus Gonzales was a sex offender serving time in State Penn.

-Bob screamed rape! but the nearby policeman laughed, thinking he said, “Grape”

-There was no toilet anywhere so I just let it out in my briefcase

-Aarron’s vegetable garden was burned in the great fire of 1993. Don’t worry though, Aarron never ate vegetables anyway, just eggs

-John thought the day might be getting better when he heard a loud joke and laughed heartily, but then the roof collapsed across the street. Was it an omen?

-Jim sported a pained expression when his bowels emptied

-The slant-eyed Japs blew my buddy half to bits before he slit himself with his knife. Fucking bastards don’t know what they’ve got themselves into this time.

-blind people can't see colors

-Sweet ropes of sweat encircled and ensnared the delicate fruit of temptation as Christopher masturbated to the grainy, cascading footage of the skylark sun princess creeping through the hedge maze on his makeshift TV.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Love knew no boundaries in Pete's relationship, so much that he completely disregarded even the physical existence of his girlfriend.

Anonymous said...

Todd, casual Friday doesn't permit banging the cleaning woman in your office!

Anonymous said...

That frog takes good notes

Anonymous said...

Dr. Lukis and his pals took periodic sick days to put on ski masks and egg protesters at the abortion clinic.

Anonymous said...

Depressed king of the jungle in denim jeans goes for a smoke.

Edward said...

That first name by Zack is great.

Daniel said...

I like the frog one, don't ask me why

Edward said...

Hey, when it works, it works

Edward said...

Damn, this is a tough one to pick my favorite from. They are evenly matched. I'll go with slant-eyed Japs--angry racism in name-writing is always glorious. #2 I'll give to "Grape," just because I ragged on it for so long.

Daniel said...

continuing with the ever present bathroom humor:

Jim sported a pained expression when his bowels emptied.

Yes!

molly said...

-Bob screamed rape! but the nearby policeman laughed, thinking he said, “Grape”


this is not only my favorite from this list, but one of the best from the ones i was allowed to read over the years.

Edward said...

And Daniel's name gets yet more overpraise. Haha, I'm kidding (am I?)